Fears
by Church1alpha
Summary: The Golden Trio have a conversation about their biggest fears after the war. Short one-shot.


The war had ended, and the Golden Trio had returned to Hogwarts to finish their NEWT years. Ron and Hermione started dating like everyone had known they would, but much to the surprise of his friends, Harry didn't resume dating Ginny. She eventually contented herself with Neville, but Harry's friends were at a loss to explain his change in behavior. One night, while sitting with her friends in the Gryffindor common room, Hermione had a thought.

"Ron," she tentatively asked, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, Hermione. What do you want to know?"

"What's your biggest fear?"

Ron looked confused. "Why do you want to know?"

"Well, it's important for two people who are in a relationship together to know each other well, and I don't actually know what you're most afraid of."

"That's a tricky question, Hermione. I'm not sure, but I think that I'm most afraid of spiders. Yeah, spiders. Can't stand the little buggers."

"Hmm," Hermione said. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. You have always hated spiders." Ron shrugged and went back to playing chess. Hermione turned to Harry and asked, "What about you, Harry? What's your biggest fear?"

He waved his wand, casting a silencing charm, then looked at her, his eyes dark. "Do you really want to know? Really?"

"Of course, Harry. Whatever it is, it can't be that bad. Is it still Dementors? Or Ginny dying?"

"No, Hermione. It's neither of those. It's- complicated. Very complicated. And you won't like it."

"What is it? You can tell me, Harry. I'm your best friend."

"Fine, but only because you asked. My biggest fear is losing you. It has been for a while. I can't bear the thought of waking up one day and not being able to see you again. I love you, Hermione. I have for years, since a little after the troll, but I was sure in our second year. I waited by your bed every day for you to wake up, even sneaking back to the hospital wing after curfew to spend nights watching over you with the cloak. Every day I saw you frozen, my heart broke a little more. Third year, after we saved Buckbeak and Sirius, I thought that maybe, just maybe, you felt the same. I was going to ask you to the ball fourth year, but I was too afraid, and then it was too late. Fifth year I was sure, and I was going to ask if we could go on some dates over the summer, but the events at the ministry ruined everything. And then came sixth year. You wanted Ron, pined for him. I knew that I'd lost my chance, and even when you chose me during the Horcrux hunt, I knew it wasn't like that. But I love you, Hermione. I always have. And losing you? That's my biggest fear. That's what keeps me awake at nights."

Hermione was speechless. She had never imagined that he would feel this way about her, but she was saddened by the knowledge of what she had to say to him. "Harry, I'm sorry, but I just don't feel the same. I'm in love with Ron. I care for you very deeply, I love you as a friend and brother, but I don't love you like that, like you want me to."

He looked back at her, and she was shocked by how much despair she saw in his eyes, try as he might to hide it. "It's okay, Hermione. I understand. The only reason I'm telling you at all is because nobody will know that this was my answer. I cast a silencing charm just before this conversation, so you're the only one who can hear me. I won't lie to you, but I won't hurt you either. And I know it will hurt you, knowing what I feel and that you don't, can't, feel the same. So you won't remember. Your happiness means too much to me to jeopardize for my own sake. It's okay. Honestly. And Hermione? I'm sorry too."

She had just begun to ask what he meant when he incanted with a sorrowful voice, "Obliviate." And then she forgot.

"Sorry, must have spaced out there," she said, "So, Harry, what's your biggest fear?"

And he responded, "I dunno. Never really thought about it, I guess." But his eyes told the real story.

* * *

A/N: I was going to leave it there, but I found it super depressing and speaking as a Harmonian, I thought that the ending could have gone two ways. So here's the second (Harmonious) ending version.

Hermione was speechless. She had never imagined that he would feel this way about her, that he could feel the same way that she did. "Honestly, Harry, the truth is that I gave up on you a little. I was convinced that you didn't share my feelings and never would, and contented myself with Ron. We don't work very well together, and I've been planning to break up with him for a while. He's got more emotional depth than he had, but he and I just don't share the bond that you and I do. If you still want me, I'd love to give dating you a try."

Harry was overjoyed to hear this, but still understandably nervous. "Won't Ron take it badly, though?"

"I've been dropping hints for a while now, and I think he knows it's coming. And I know for a fact that Luna's been waiting years to get a crack at him. I think she'll do a good job of distracting him, and I know that the two of them will be a better couple than we were. So, what do you say? Want to go to the next Hogsmeade weekend with me?"

"I'd love to," he responded.


End file.
